Fat shaming and wilfully low IQ.

I really don’t appreciate it when everyone that crosses my path is suddenly a medical professional. I’ve spent most of my adult and teen life at 250lbs. I was born with poorly functioning lungs and several other health issues.

At the start of puberty, I began to gain my weight faster than anyone eating and moving like I was should gain. I went from WELL under 100lbs at 10yrs old to watching the scale climb.

I found out I have a Metabolic Syndrome which includes Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and a pancreas that will overwork no matter what I do. Insulin, in and of itself, makes you gain weight. Having to then prevent potentially deadly low blood sugar levels, even if you’re not hungry and ate 5min ago only adds to the problem.

People assume if you are overweight and diabetic that you ate a poor diet first and then became diabetic. While that is true for some people it’s not even close to all of them.

I also have bad lungs. The Prednisone therapy needed to keep me breathing also causes weight gain. People still assume I must live on junk food. I can’t stand the stuff.

I was very ill 6 yrs ago. Over the years I was in and out of the hospital trying to get my lungs back on track I went from 250 to North of 500lbs. I stopped looking at the scale at 500lbs.

I credit a bad divorce and family stress for my loss of over 250lbs. I am, however, at 350, 100lbs larger than when I started, I would like to get back to 250lbs.

I’m not ashamed of myself. I eat a healthful diet and exercise as much as I can while caring for my elderly parents. I am however incredibly embarrassed FOR ALL of those people that feel free to criticize me. Clearly, they have a VERY limited understanding of how the human body works and it’s pretty obvious they aren’t capable or willing to know any better. That reading a patient leaflet is beyond them or their willingness to know what they are talking about, let alone picking up a medical text.

They rely heavily on the media to tell them that anyone who is overweight and diabetic MUST have done this to themselves and of course they think we’re idiots. If they could grasp such a limited concept then we must be stupid to not understand that it’s “ONLY” about calories in and movement to erase said calories.

Somehow it’s never about genetics. It’s never about medical conditions. After all, if it were, wouldn’t the media and everyone who isn’t a Doctor but IS somehow a perpetually thin, “expert” on the subject of fat, stop blaming everything on fat people…? (Of course not. Shame sells and so does superiority.)

If you try to insult me under the guise of helping me lose weight. You are an idiot and you must think I’m an idiot If you think I believe a near or total stranger gives a crap about my health.

If “You’re fat!” is your go to insult. You are an idiot. If you are delusional enough to think for even a nanosecond that I don’t know I’m fat or how to eat correctly and exercise…. YOU. ARE. A. GIANT. A-HOLE. *AND* AN. IDIOT.

You however, you ARE NOT, a Doctor. Let alone a Doctor that specializes in metabolic disorders. Please practice your pretend medicine elsewhere. Better yet, don’t. If you still wanted to play Dr at my age you should have tried harder in school.

If you actually are an M.D. but you do not specialize in Genetic Medicine and Endocrinology with an emphasis on Pulmonology and nutrition then again, you are also under qualified to have much, if any discussion with me about my weight. Should you do so, I will now assume since you’ve interrupted my life and taken such a great deal of concern in my health, that you are now my Doctor and will provide all treatment, foods, gym memberships and medications free of charge. After all, why else would you give away your services to begin with if you hadn’t planned on seeing this through?

If you simply continue to insist on being wilfully ignorant and rude with your assumptions then I reserve the right to assume that even though society has deemed you fit to serve on a jury and operate heavy machinery, you are lazy, wasting your potential, and wasting your time as well as mine.

You are fully capable of knowing the truth but choose not to.

Political problems. Have we become blinded by personal issues?

When I sift through my social media feeds, I can’t help but notice how passionate everyone is about what they believe to be the correct way to either live life or direct this country etc. This makes me wonder; Are we so focused on what other citizens could be doing, that we aren’t playing attention to what really matters? What is the bigger picture? Do you really care who may or may not be having an abortion, when you aren’t pro birth control or Welfare? Does it matter which adults marry the other adults they love if both want to be married? 

Now some people are screaming that it does to all of the above but now ask yourself this; What are my biggest worries to the actual safety of everyone? Yeah, it’s probably not the aforementioned issues. So next question; Who do I feel is best equipped to handle any issues our nation may face come the next election? Now I won’t answer this question for you. I expect and encourage you to look, listen, and read all about everyone involved. You might even surprise yourself and change parties. Perhaps not vote a single party ticket. I honestly think to vote blindly is as bad as not voting at all. 

Now here’s where I’m going to get sexist. I’m thrilled to be a woman. I’m also thrilled to have been born into the right to vote. Keep in mind ladies that women haven’t, at the time of the posting, had this right for even 100 years yet! I expect us to read. I expect us as women, to care. It was a long, difficult fight for a basic right and I’ve heard too many people (but ladies I’m calling us out now.) say they don’t know, don’t care, or whatever happens, happens. Ok… REALLY? WTF? Especially with that last one! So if “Whatever happens” turns out to be very well trained turtles you’re happy to roll with that? I’m kidding of course, but only kinda… No you wouldn’t be okay with that and yes you will want someone you believe in, in office but until you actually put away the pettiness of micromanaging other people (very us vs them when the them is still us) and start thinking about the future of an entire nation (Now that’s Patriotic!… Well, you might as well stick to voting for contestants. At least you’re half paying attention to the TV.

The moment guys understand…

A guy who knows what I had been through thought it would be nice to make a rape joke to me and that as a victim I could brush it off. After all, as a woman, aren’t I suppose to smile and keep my mouth shut? 

Well I’ve never been one for the self inflicted pain of biting my tongue or a fan of pandering to anyone’s ego.

So, I turned his joke back on him, and jokingly myself, offered to stick his beer bottle where I doubt most people would want it. He was appalled and offended. He even began to threaten violence over something I said with the lightest of tones. It was then I asked him how he thought I felt. He honestly looked confused. He tried to argue that “it’s different” and even tried to “school” me on how I should feel. My only response was “Keep it up, I have lotion in my purse.” Again he couldn’t win. More anger, more fear, and even more of trying to justify his double standard. I pointed out that when the tables are turned it’s not so laughable.

I told him to think about how my jokes felt like physical threats. To think about how he would feel to have his own body invaded by someone or something that he didn’t want. 

Was I crass? Yes. Are all rape jokes wrong? Yes. Did I drive the point home? Yes. 

Fortunately or sadly he doesn’t have that same experience 10 times a day. Perhaps if he knew the world from the side of too many women out there he would make greater efforts to improve his own ideal of what’s right or how things should be. 

Until you’ve had a someone go from flirting with you one second and threatening to kill you the next, or a guy walk up to you in a bar with his penis out, having never met you and obviously displaying the only thing he thinks is interesting about himself, I am sad to say you don’t know what it’s like.

Much like a man child on Facebook that after several “Hello” messages that I didn’t have time to respond to, decided to put his anything but stellar vocabulary to the test and send me a message that read, “Sit on my face.” He wanted attention and now he has it. He apologized and said “Don’t be mad.” To which I replied that I am completely lucid and as far from “mad” as one could be. I then told him that I wasn’t even angry and worse I wasn’t disappointed either. 

He, and I fear this is where many guys go wrong, honestly thought he was being sexy. I made it clear that was the least sexy thing he could have typed, but judging by his typing that was probably the best he could do. After I read him the standard riot act that any woman over 25 has committed to memory. He tries to explain that he only wanted my attention and a response. I asked him if he would make the same request of his boss, should he need to get their attention? He said he wouldn’t. I asked if that’s the voicemail he leaves for his mother, sister, or daughter when they neglect his tragic pleas. Apparently it isn’t. So then I asked what made him think I would at all, feel honored to receive the perverse attention he had decided to bestow upon me? He didn’t know so I left him with this, “If you wouldn’t address any woman in your family in the manner you’re considering and if you know you would get fired from your job if you tried it with your boss, then perhaps you are better off not communicating at all.” 

Not that some of these jerks aren’t fun to play with. When I got a message saying “I want to put my dick in you’re but.” I knew that was going to be hours of fun turning that poorly written statement into the “Who’s On First?” of awful attempts at sexting. (Yes I can type “But what?” for hours.) 

I’m not saying guys aren’t allowed to flirt. I’m not suggesting we stop talking dirty to each other. I just think both sides should consent before digging through your mental smut files. 

Trust me it’s more fun that way.